Number Crunch

How Nestlé Messed Up 380 Tons of Hot Pockets

Glass and plastic are supposedly not good for you

763,000: That’s how many pounds of pepperoni Hot Pockets Nestlé recalled from grocery stores earlier this month, as reported by the Associated Press. The problem: This batch of the frozen calzone-like food “may be contaminated with extraneous materials, specifically pieces of glass and hard plastic,” according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Safety and Inspection Service. Just to make sure you get the message, the agency adds that “this product should be thrown away or returned to the place of purchase.” (If you’re hoarding a freezer full of Hot Pockets and you want to make sure you’re in the clear, check Nestlé’s announcement for product codes and other details.)

For some of us, just thinking about 763,000 pounds of Hot Pockets — even if the filling doesn’t include random debris — is enough to curb the appetite. But the stalwart microwavable meal has been a reliable convenience-food option for decades, growing into a staple with a dizzying range of fillings. While the brand has seen sales weaken in recent years, it reportedly got a boost in the pandemic as stay-at-home consumers sought “familiar” brands.

Still, it’s hard to think of Hot Pockets without recalling comedian Jim Gaffigan’s many jokes at the dubious foodstuff’s expense. This one seems particularly apt: “I was looking at a box of Hot Pockets. They have a warning printed on the side. It said, ‘Warning! You just bought Hot Pockets!’”

I think I’ll just have a salad.

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