How ‘the Motherhood Penalty’ Plays Out for Startup Founders

My experience fundraising while pregnant made it clear that VCs should reflect the experience of the founders they purport to support

Roxanne Petraeus
Marker
Published in
7 min readJul 30, 2020

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Photo: pixdeluxe/E+/Getty Images

Midway through a call with a prominent venture capitalist last fall, he asked me, apropos of nothing, if I was pregnant. Previously, we’d been discussing what can broadly be described as “business things” — my nascent idea for a company that would tackle the dated world of corporate training, the trade-offs between starting my own company versus joining one of his startups. This abrupt topic shift caught me off guard. I flashed back to the small plus sign on the pregnancy test I’d taken days before.

Clearly, there was a right answer. “Nope,” I replied, knowing that I was not going to tell this man before I told my own mother. Then, for good measure, I added, “Also, it’s illegal to ask.” I’d been researching employment law because of my corporate training startup and had come across this scenario countless times. Woman interviews for a job, the hiring manager tries to suss out, with varying degrees of deftness, whether she is or will become a mother.

Revenue, team, and market size are all fair game. Womb occupancy status is not.

“This isn’t a job interview,” he countered. Thrown off by the detour to obstetrics, I tried to recall the legal specifics: Was he right? Was it only California law that covered non-employment relationships such as a founder pitching an investor? Why was this happening? When the call ended, I realized the legal details, while a bit murky, were almost beside the point. Revenue, team, and market size are all fair game. Womb occupancy status is not.

When the call ended, I recapped the experience to my husband, certain that the only reason the investor asked was some sort of ambition litmus test; the VC wanted to know if my best days were behind me. We debated for a bit, and while I couldn’t prove the VC’s intent, it was the most logical explanation. “I wasn’t asking for breast pump recommendations,” I hurled across the room, attempting to end the argument, and my husband reluctantly agreed that there wasn’t a great alternative…

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Roxanne Petraeus
Marker
Writer for

Co-founder of Ethena, Army veteran, and pun appreciator